Chapter 22

 

For the next couple of days, I practice guitar for at least 10 minutes every day. Aunt Cynthia knows that I’m playing, but she doesn’t exactly know that I am improving. But the thing is: I am. My chord switching has gotten pretty fast, and for once in my life, I’m proud of myself. 

 

And on a Thursday evening, I’m sitting on my bed, perfecting the chord switches, and knowing that singing is next. 

I almost gave up, knowing that I’m terrible at singing and I sounded like a goose whenever I sang. But this song is one I really wanted to play, it was one I loved so much. 

It was around 5:45 and Aunt Cynthia went out to shop for the weekly groceries. She usually goes out on weekends, but we ran low so she decided to go today. 

After some thinking and going back and forth, I decided to give singing a go. Plus, no one was here to hear me anyways. So what’s the worst that could happen?

The worst that could happen is hearing clapping in my bedroom after I’m done singing.

I shiver at the thought. But this wasn’t a dream, this wasn’t my dream, this was real. 

And so, by heart, I started strumming and playing the intro of Superstar by Taylor Swift. 

After strumming through D, A, E minor and G twice, I open my mouth. 

“This is wrong but,” switch to E minor. “I can’t help but feel like,” D, “there ain’t nothing more right, babe.” E minor, G… good! 

“Misty morning,” D, A, “comes again and I can’t,” G, D, A…. “Help but wish I could see your face.”

“And I knew from the first note played I’d be… breakin’ all my rules to see youuu,” I switch chords fast and they seem to fit together like puzzle pieces to a puzzle. 

“You smile that beautiful smile and all the girls in the front row, scream your name.”

I strum and sing through the rest of the song, and feel so good afterwards. I wasn’t sure what my singing sounded like, but I liked that no one was hearing me or judging me. I could just sing by myself. 

And the chord switching wasn’t bad, I think multitasking while singing and strumming wasn’t too hard. I needed work – it wasn’t perfect. Not yet. 

I must’ve not heard the door opening downstairs, because the next thing I know is seeing Aunt Cynthia pushing my door open and a shocked look on her face after I sang the chorus. 

“Oh,” I stop strumming. “Hi.” 

“Sorry if I startled you… I heard you singing,” Aunt Cynthia sits next to me on my bed. 

“Uh, yeah.”

“Your voice is beautiful,” she combs my hair back. 

I smile but don’t say anything. I knew my aunt, she sometimes just says things to make me happy. This easily could just be another white lie on how ‘good’ my singing was. 

“Come downstairs, I’ll cook up some dinner,” and then she leaves me sitting there, feeling embarrassed but somehow relieved on exposing my singing. 

 

Next Monday morning, I’m convinced that it was the coldest day of the year. It wasn’t the cozy type of cold, where big, fluffy snowflakes were drifting down peacefully into a blanket of white, puffy snow. It was just the cold kind, where frost was growing on windows and it was dry outside. There was a nasty wind that seemed to bend the trees whenever it inhaled and exhaled. The cold air nipped at my red cheeks as I walked into the school, tying my scarf tighter around my neck to cover my mouth. 

I meet Lily at the entrance. “Hey,” I say. 

Lily turns around to face me. She wore earmuffs and a puffy blue jacket but didn’t look cold at all. 

“Hi!” She greets me with excitement, “we’re judging the non-staged talent show people today, and we wondered if you wanted to judge with us..?” 

I thought about it. Lily had already asked me if I wanted to judge the staged talent show, but I said no due to schoolwork and just pressing stress. But today, it was getting close to Christmas break so the work is starting to wrap up anyways. So, why not? It could be cool to see other kids perform and audition too. 

“Sure,” I smile under my scarf, “it’ll be fun.”

“Okay!” Lily does a little squeal, “I’m so excited to see all the others perform.”

We hang up our coats in our lockers, and then head straight to our first class, which is Geometry. 

“What time are the auditions?” I hear myself asking.

“Lunchtime, so we’ll have to miss that.”

“Okay.”

The rest of the day goes on like any other – boring, stressful, but usual. I catch myself looking forward to lunchtime and seeing other students my age and older do wild talents. This was the non-staged one – my idea – so it makes sense that I have to see at least the auditions. 

Christmas break and the new year also hung in the air and was usually in many conversations and topics at school. I myself was very prepared for Christmas – prepared to relax, even if it was only for a little while. I needed to get a load off my shoulders, maybe try something new or be bored even. Who knows. It was about a week before Christmas holidays, and I was surprised that the teachers weren’t lowering schoolwork, not even a little. I’ll probably be sent home with homework during Christmas break. Ugh! 

The morning seems to go by like a video in slo-mo. But somehow all of the sudden, lunchtime arrives.